Where do Elflings come from?
by Gre3nleaf
Summary: Every child asks it, and every parent dreads it.


**Where do Elflings come from?**

 **The twins are about 7. Enjoy!**

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 _The question_ hadn't even been thought about until their friend's baby sister had been born, but now that she had been, Elladan and Elrohir just couldn't stop thinking about it.

Where _did_ elflings come from?

Did they just pop out of their mothers' stomachs? Did they get carried down from the clouds in little bags by the eagles? Did they grow out of the ground? The twins couldn't quite put their fingers on it. They didn't understand how elflings could be born with everything they needed; legs, arms, a beating heart, bones, a nose… how did it work?

"Maybe Gandalf conjures one up with his staff," Elladan said thoughtfully, and Elrohir nodded.

"I bet he does!" the younger twin said, before his face fell. "I wish he was here so that we could ask him."

Elladan sighed. "So do I. But I bet there is someone else who can tell us!" he said happily, and Elrohir agreed, the two skipping down the hallway to find somebody familiar they could ask the seemingly innocent question.

But, of course, this wasn't an innocent question at all, and it had been one the Lord Elrond had been dreading since the day his boys were born. They were bound to ask at some point, and he'd spent weeks in his room trying to prepare the speech he would give to his sons one day. Celebrian had placed this burden on him, explaining to the baffled lord that that was how it worked – fathers gave _the talk_ to their sons, and mothers gave _the talk_ to their daughters.

"But you will be able to explain things so much better, meleth nin! I do not know how I will be able to…" Elrond had said, trying desperately to find a way out of this, but Celebrian had turned, placed her hands on her hips and given her husband a very disapproving frown.

"You are the healer, Elrond! Find a way!" she said, and then, with a most Celebrian-like huff, flounced out of the room.

So you can imagine the look of absolute dismay on his face when his twin sons waked quietly into his study, clambered onto the sofa and sat for a moment, identical frowns on their faces.

"Ada," they started, and Elrond's eyes widened.

"No!" the elf lord said, leaping from his seat behind his desk and running out of the room.

He didn't know where he was going, but he knew that he had to find a way out of this impending doom.

He breathed heavily as he ran, consequently bumping into Glorfindel. He almost fell back if it wasn't for the balrog-slayer's lightning-fast reflexes. "Why are you in such a hurry?" the blond asked concernedly, and Elrond shook his head.

"Elladan and Elrohir were about to ask me a question!" he said, worriedly looking behind him for any sign of the twin terrors.

Glorfindel elegantly rose one eyebrow. "A question, Elrond?"

"Yes. You have got to help me!" the mighty Lord of Rivendell said in a panic, grabbing Glorfindel's hands and dragging him along the corridor.

"Whoa, whoa!" the balrog-slayer said, not knowing what was going on in the slightest. "I do not understand! You said the twins asked you a question-"

"No, almost! They almost asked me a question!"

"-um, alright. You said the twins almost asked you a question."

"Mhm!"

"What was the question?"

Elrond's eyes widened. Even thinking of _the question_ made his head spin. Leaning forward, he hissed in Glorfindel's ear: " _Where do elflings come from?"_

And that was it. Glorfindel's own eyes grew larger than they ever had done before, and he grabbed Elrond's hand, dragging _him_ down the corridor. "I have been dreading this day for years!" he said in an anxious tone, and Elrond nodded frantically.

"We must hide, or they will find us!"

"Who will find you?"

The balrog-slayer and Lord of Rivendell stopped in surprise, breathing sighs of relief when Erestor rounded the corner, whose dark brows were furrowed on his very confused face.

Glorfindel let go of Elrond's hand and pushed the advisor behind a tapestry. "Shush!" he said when the elf in front of him opened his mouth to speak. He turned to look at Elrond. "Is all clear?"

The peredhel poked his head behind the tapestry, quickly bringing it back in again. "Yes, we are safe for now."

"Safe from wh-" Erestor began, but quickly shut his mouth again when his two – obviously insane – friends glared fiercely at him.

"The twins," Glorfindel whispered, "have asked Elrond a question."

"What question?" Erestor whispered back.

" _The_ question," Elrond hissed, and the advisor's eyes slowly began to widen in realisation. Suddenly, he laughed.

"Is that all?" he asked.

"What do you mean, _is that all_?" Elrond said angrily, "this is a huge deal! How do you expect me to explain to my sons how an elfling is made?"

"It is quite simple, actually," Erestor said, before pushing the two startled elves down to the floor. "You sit there, and pretend you are the twins."

"I am Elrohir," Glorfindel said, sticking his hand up in the air, and Elrond glared at him.

"No, I am Elrohir," he protested.

"I said it first!"

"He is _my_ son!"

"DARO!" Erestor shouted, and the elf lords in front of him shut their mouths guiltily. "I do not care who is who, just listen. Now, _elflings_ , when an Ada and a Nana love each other very much, and want to have a- a baby, they… they… um… no, I have nothing."

"Ha!" Elrond said with a grin, pointing his finger at his advisor, "this _is_ a huge deal."

"Ada?"

The three elves spun around at the sound of a small voice, and their hearts started beating wildly at the sight of the twins stood there in front of them.

"Why did you run away?" Elladan asked.

"We only wanted to know where elflings came from," Elrohir said with a shrug.

Glorfindel, Elrond and Erestor stared at each other, before slowly turning back to the twins with grim smiles.

"Sit down," Glorfindel said, pushing the children onto the floor, before turning back to the older peredhel. "Good luck," he said, grabbing Erestor and bursting out from behind the tapestry, the two of them running off down the hall.

Elrond stared open-mouthed at the flowing tapestry, stilling it with his hand before balling his fists and beginning to breathe heavily. How _\- how dare they_? How _dare_ they leave him like this? He was going to… he was going to… _he was going to_ -

"Ada?"

The Lord of Rivendell looked at the two innocent boys sat in front of him, and sighed. Well. It was now or never.

"Um. Alright. You must, er- you must listen carefully. Now, elflings, when an Ada and a Nana love each other very much, and want to have a baby..."

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 **Elvish used:**

 **Meleth nin – My love**

 **Ada – Daddy**

 **Daro – Stop**

 **Nana – Mummy**

* * *

 **Well, there we have it! The (obviously fake, because of course Elrond, Glorfindel and Erestor would know how to explain something like that to the twins) story of how Elladan and Elrohir found out about how elflings were… um… where they came from…**

 **Hope you enjoyed! Please review! ~ Gre3nleaf**


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